How to Talk to Children
#1 More Conversation Starters
"That looks like a lot of fun! What's your favorite part about [this activity/place]?"
Observing their engagement and asking about their enjoyment can get them to open up about what makes the experience positive for them.
"If you could have any superpower, what would it be and why?"
Open-ended, imaginative questions can spark creativity and encourage kids to share their thoughts and personalities in a fun way.
"That's a really cool [backpack]! Where did you get it?"
Kids often have unique items they're proud of. Complimenting something specific they own can be a great, low-pressure way to show interest and open a conversation about their choices and interests.
"Hi! Do you know where the [library/restroom/snack bar] is around here? I'm a bit lost."
Asking for simple directions can make a child feel helpful and knowledgeable, and provides a quick, low-stakes interaction.
"(See them with a pet.) What a cute [dog/cat]! What's its name?"
Most kids love talking about their pets. This is a very common and effective way to start a warm conversation.
"What's the funniest thing that happened to you today?"
Asking about humor can lighten the mood and encourage them to share a lighthearted story, if they're comfortable.
"What's the coolest thing you've learned recently?"
This question is designed to get them to share something new and exciting they've encountered, whether at school or elsewhere.
"I used to love [playing with blocks/drawing/reading about dinosaurs] when I was your age. Do you like that too?"
Sharing a brief, relatable anecdote about your own childhood interests can make you seem approachable and give them something to connect with.
"Are you excited for [the weekend/school to be out/this event]? What are your plans?"
Tapping into their anticipation for an upcoming event or break can generate a positive and engaging discussion about their interests outside of the immediate situation.
"What's the best [ice cream flavor/snack] here? I can't decide!"
Asking for a recommendation on something enjoyable like food or treats gives them a chance to share their preferences and expertise.
"Do you know if this [park/place] has a good [swing set/slide/climbing wall]?"
Asking about specific features of an environment, especially ones kids are likely to know about and enjoy, can be a simple way to get them talking.
"I heard someone say something really interesting about [topic in the environment, e.g., the new playground equipment]. What do you think about it?"
Referencing something that's already part of their immediate environment or a recent common discussion point can be a low-risk way to get their opinion.
"That's a really interesting [drawing/creation]! What's it about?"
If a child is creating something, showing genuine interest in their work can encourage them to explain their ideas and imagination.
"Do you have any big plans for the [summer/winter break]?"
Inquiring about future plans, especially during breaks, can prompt discussions about their hopes and activities.
"If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go and why?"
This question encourages imaginative thinking and allows them to express their dreams and desires for exploration.
"That looks like a tricky [puzzle/activity]. How do you figure it out?"
If a child is working on something challenging, acknowledging their effort and asking about their process can be encouraging and lead to them explaining what they're doing.
"What's your favorite subject in school? Mine was always [science/art/history]."
Relating to their school experience can open a conversation about their academic interests, and sharing your own can make it a two-way street.
"What's your favorite [animal/book/movie]? I'm trying to find something new to [read/watch/learn about]."
Asking for a recommendation empowers the child and shows you value their opinion. It also provides a clear topic for them to talk about.
"Wow, that looks like a really fun [game/toy]! What's your favorite part about it?"
If a child is engaged in an activity, asking about it shows you're paying attention and interested in what they enjoy. This is a natural way to get them to share.
"I saw you [doing something impressive like a cool trick or good play]. That was really [cool/smart/strong]! How did you learn to do that?"
Directly complimenting a skill or action they've performed well can boost their confidence and make them more likely to talk about their abilities.
"(Notice something they're wearing like a sports team logo.) Are you a big fan of the [team]? Do you play [the sport] too?"
If they're wearing something that indicates an interest, asking about it shows you're observant and creates an immediate common ground.
"What's your favorite kind of music or band?"
Music is a common interest, and asking about their preferences can reveal a lot about their tastes and what they listen to.
"(Drop a pen or something small near them.) Oh no! Can you help me pick that up? Thanks!"
Creating a small, harmless "problem" that they can easily help with gives them an opportunity to be helpful and you a natural way to say thank you and potentially follow up.
"Do you have any [siblings/pets]? What are they like?"
Asking about family or pets can be a way to learn more about their home life and connections, though be mindful of privacy.